Funerals, and why Don Bosco said, “A piece of heaven fixes everything.”

 There is something powerful about gathering as a family after a loss.  At a funeral mass today, as we walked by the coffin, there was no denying the death that had been undergone, the finality of the loss, or the silent suffering of a family that has said goodbye to a significant member.

At the funeral for my friend’s father, the words she spoke last night came to mind.  “He was a good and holy man, who lived a life that was faithful and true,” she said.  She told us Sisters how after his wife left him for someone else, he cared for the kids, and never even thought of remarrying.  His vows were for life.  What a beautiful example of fidelity in marriage.  And, she said, “He was also faithful to God,” bringing those children to weekly mass.  Apparently, this man worked three jobs, and returning after 2 a.m., he brought the kids to weekly Mass, just the same.

In our world which is so affected by a lack of fidelity – less that 20% of Catholics practice their religion, we are told, and in a time when divorce prevails – some 50% of those who are married today will be divorced – it is impressive to see someone who was so upright in remaining faithful to both human and divine commitments.  What a beautiful message to his children and grandchildren this man sent.  His silent refusal to go along and “move on” without fulfilling his first promise speaks loudly to me of what is meant when we say we will be “true to death”.  His witness of following the third Commandment, even though he could easily have excused himself for exhaustion, speaks of really putting God first!

One of my favorite sayings of Don Bosco is, “A piece of heaven fixes everything.”  I love that saying because in so many ways, it rings true in my life….it forces me to ask, “What is really important?”  “What really matters?”  “In the end, when I stand before God, will this truly be important?”  I wish I had known my friend’s dad personally.  I’d like to thank him for making this all so real, for making me realize how little things are irrelevant when we think of our eternity with God.

A friend of mine teases me, saying I often reply, “Whatever.”  I guess that is because in my childhood, my parents always reminded us that what most preterbs us is frequently of little or no consequence.  So, Don Bosco and Joe and RoseMary Clair had a lot in common.   They all looked much more at the big picture and the eternal importance of so many very little things.

Today, I promise to recall what is really important, and to focus on that so as to grow closer to God.  After a few years – 80 or so – that is all that will truly matter!

“Twittering” at NCCYM…

Yep, it really happened…  No, I’m not kidding – I’m thinking of investing in one of these t-shirts.  Have you seen them?  Really, I have to thank my friend Alicia for introducing me to this phrase at all, but now, I can actually say, in my great humility…(*ahem…quit laughing those of  you who know me well)…that I’m feeling like, “I’m kind of a big deal!” 

Here’s the whole story:  The other day, I get an email asking if I know Anne Marie Cribbins.  Yes, I write back…thinking she is either very sick or in need of help, or some tragedy has befallen her or something.  Well, it turns out, Anne Marie suggested me for a project, one I’m thrilled to be part of.  Here’s the plan – and if  you love “techie” stuff, this is right up your alley…

I will be one of a few people “Twittering” about the National Conference of Catholic Youth Ministers (NCCYM) to take place in Cleveland in December.  Twitter is a cool site.  You can update what you are doing in just a few words - from your cell (yes, you can post to a blog from a cell!!!) or your computer.  It’s pretty incredible.  So as I experience the NCCYM, I can just give short feedback or impressions…share thoughts about talks, inspirations, etc. 

Now, here’s the cool part.  There is a whole set of people who will be Twittering about the NCCYM at this site:  http://www.nccymmicroblog.2smallcoins.org/  We’re giving our “two small coins” as input.  I hope the Lord realizes it’s all I have!

Changes…conversions…and a future Sister.

Here is an interesting news piece that a Salesian priest, Fr. Mike sent to me today…

Hollywood screenwriter returns to Cleveland, turns life over to GodCLEVELAND (CNS) — The Gospel of Luke’s prodigal son has nothing on Joe Eszterhas. A self-described “Hollywood animal,” Eszterhas is best known for writing such adult-themed thrillers as “Basic Instinct” and “Jagged Edge.” He is a guy who seemed to live his earlier life as if the seven deadly sins were a personal to-do list. But then Eszterhas found God. Or as Eszterhas writes in his latest memoir, “Crossbearer,” God found him. Today, the man who once was the center of attention at exclusive Hollywood restaurants, enjoys the easygoing community spirit of sharing a meal with his wife, Naomi, and the couple’s four sons at a Lenten fish fry at Holy Angels Parish, in suburban Bainbridge, where he often carries the cross at Mass. A screenwriter who describes his younger self as arrogant and full of hubris now reads the works of Trappist Father Thomas Merton and Dutch-born Father Henri Nouwen for spiritual guidance. Days that once started and ended with cigarettes and gin, now are filled with prayer and quiet walks in nature.

 

 

Now, without saying too much, let’s just say that every life has its times of conversion…and every person lives their “growing pains” in different ways, but I can relate to this change of heart.  God works in the life of each person.  And no, nuns are NOT born with veils on their heads and rosaries in their hands.  My favorite story is of a Sister who is a friend of mine who says before she entered, she was almost kicked out of a bar one night when she had had a few beers and began to dance on the table!

There are times when I wonder, “God, how can you do your work with such plain and simple instruments?” And then, like St. Paul, I realize that is JUST why He chose me – so that HIS work would be evident.  After all, what good could I potentially do?  So God is making His presence obvious by purposely choosing a weak instrument.  (I hope all those who wonder whether or not God is calling them to religious life reread and meditate on that sentence, because often we think we are not worthy, and we are not!)

Mother Teresa of Calcutta wanted to be a pencil in the hand of God.  There was an early Salesian who told Don Bosco he wanted to be like a handkerchief in his hands.  My hope is to be that available, to be that malleable, so that God can do all the good that is possible with this Kleenex!

I’m practically Italian…

It’s pretty certain that my community, or those who know me well will laugh when they see the title of this…  Why will they laugh?  Because I often say, “I’m practically Mexican.  My sister-in-law is Mexican, My neice and nephews are Mexican, I love Mexican food and make a mean seven layer dip…I’m practically Mexican!”

In fact, I really love foreign cultures, languages, customs, places.  While I wouldn’t consider myself a world traveller, and while I’m much more of a home body than anything else, I love savoring other cultures, practices, languages and peoples.

Obviously, from the roots of my religious family, I love Italy most of foreign places, and because I have a relatively good grip, and some very close friends here, I really consider myself Italian.  I learned the Roman dialect when I was here as a novice…and loved to speak using that dialect.  There is something so warm, so genuine and so simple about this culture and this people; how could I not be attracted.

A novelty since the last time I was here is the Smart Car.  Have you seen one?  I hadn’t till I came here – but they are cars that are slightly larger than matchboxes.  Here are some interesting pics I found online, very similar to what I see allover in Rome!

Now, for anyone who has ever boarded a bus in Italy, or been on a street and seen the traffic, or seen lines, or any of the funny things that Italians do, here is a video you will enjoy.  It is a look at the Italy that I not only love, but that makes me laugh.  Lines?  Why bother!  Roads?  Try sidewalks!  Parking?  Certainly not parallel!  Bus?  You can wait!  Signs?  Why two when 22 will do?

 

So if you get the chance – and those of you in formation will have at least a full year here…bring your Italian-English Dictionary, bring a warm heart, an open mind, and a good sense of humor!

“Vado io” or “vado she-o”…

 

There is a saying in our constitutions, and in our history, which is in Italian.  It says that we should live in an attitude of “vado io” (pronounced “va-doh’  ee’-oh”, or in English, “I’ll go.”).  It is the desire of every Daughter of Mary Help of Christians to fully live this willingness to be the first to do whatever is necessary.  This is why so many of our brave Sisters head off each year for the missions.  It’s  a beautiful way to live life, and when many people live this together, it’s easy to see that each one tries to make life easy for one another. 

When I was in formation, we would often hear, “it’s ‘vado io’, not ‘vado she-o’”.  We would laugh about the changing of the term, and the implication of our responsibility to be the first to step forward and offer to do work. 

In response to a questionnaire, I was looking for a definition of what customer service is, when I came across this on www.simpletruths.com, a sight I highly recommend.  I think that this young man, though he is not Salesian, nor has he undergone any formation to be a Salesian, understood well what it means to live in a spirit of “vado io” and to do something with a particular touch that demonstrates a willing heart.

more about “The Simple Truths of Service Movie“, posted with vodpod

 

I ask the Lord to renew this spirit in me and to grant this spirit to each Salesian Sister throughout the world.  Fourteen thousand (plus) of us living like this will certainly be able to change human history, don’t you think?